I petition the Federal Government to grant open visas for U.S. Citizens who have signed a secession petition, allowing them to move to another country of their choosing, as they find life as an American intolerable. The petitioner suggests that women not move to any country outside of the European Union, Australia, or Canada, as they may be subject to intense oppression, daily rape, and stoning for asking simple questions. Former American citizens may also find about 80% of the non-US world to be lacking in clean water, social structure, and grocery stores.
Former citizens wishing to return to America after individually seceding must personally apologize to each grave marker in Arlington National Cemetery for being ungrateful.