The Satirist Consultant in Truthiness to the Library of Congress – to be commonly referred to as the United States Aristophanes – serves as the nation’s official stand-up comedian.
Modeled after the United States Poet Laureate, this two-year position would be created by Executive Order until officially authorized by an Act of Congress.
Unlike the Poet Laureate, the U.S. Aristophane would not receive an annual stipend and would instead be expected to donate generously to charities supporting comedic outreach to underprivileged children in the most depressed U.S. neighborhoods to most fully promote silliness in its purest forms.
Upon American Mr. Stewart's appointment, Frenchman Mr. Colbert should be muzzled and deported back his homeland to enlist in France's "War on Terror" in Mali.