We need to ban this week in April. Very little good can come from it any more. I present the following evidence:
15th, 1865 - Lincoln Assassinated
20th, 1889 - Hitler Born
18th, 1906 - The Great San Francisco Earthquake
14th, 1912 - Titanic Sank
17th, 1961 - Bay of Pigs
18th, 1983 - Bombing of US embassy in Beirut
19th, 1993 - Branch Davidian Fire
19th, 1995 - Oklahoma City Bombing
20th, 1999 - Columbine Shooting
16th, 2007 - Virginia Tech Massacre
20th, 2010 - BP Oil Spill
15th, 2013 - Boston Marathon Bombing
17th, 2013 - Waco Fertilizer Plant Explosion
On midnight of the 14th day of April, we will immediately switch to April 21st. April will pay reparations to all other months in the form of leap days.