ban the use of all utensils and require use of a utensil called the sporknife, a traditional spork with a cutting edge

There are far too many different kinds of utensils being used in this country. This creates too much waste and is bad for the environment. Also, this means there are far too many pointy objects lying around for our nation's children/mentally handicapped to injur themselves or others. I propose this petition to streamline utensil production and use for our nation and to ensure the safety of the children/mentally handicap.