The Department of War was one of the first four Cabinet offices established in 1789. It was ultimately dissolved in 1947, and reorganized in 1949 as the current Department of Defense. Today it is the executive agency tasked with national security and overseeing the U.S. armed forces.
However, as evidenced by the efforts undertaken in Iraq and Afghanistan, 'Defense' does not fully reflect the duties of today's military. Our soldiers not only defend our borders but also fight insurgents overseas, help foreign nationals build sustainable infrastructure, and serve as an inspiration to Americans worldwide. In short, they kick a**.
As such, the Department of Defense should be renamed to reflect these expanded duties. And the Census Bureau should be folded in because [max word count]