We applaud President Obama's stance on enacting "Gun Free Zones" around our nation's schools. Gun are such deadly things; it only makes sense to keep these evil things away from our most precious and vulnerable resources -- our children -- while they learn and play.
We the People, are in fact, so overjoyed at the President's wisdom regarding this matter, we invite the President to set up a "Gun Free Zone" around himself and his own loved ones. All those deadly firearms carried by his Secret Service detail are accidents just waiting to happen. Away with them! Surely, in his wise and completely altruistic quest to make "minor" and subversive exceptions to the 2nd Amendment, the President cannot afford to snub the bulletproof protection he has selflessly bestowed upon our nation's youth.