WHEREAS Johnny Manziel, also known as "Johnny Football" has ushered in an age of collegiate football in America the likes of which we have never seen; and
WHEREAS Johnny Football has overseen the meteoric rise of Texas A&M in its first year in the SEC, in the first year of the Kevin Sumlin era; and
WHEREAS Johnny Football has statistically dominated all collegiate competition with his play on the field; and
WHERAS the Heisman Memorial Trophy Award is to be granted to the "most outstanding player in collegiate football" and makes no qualifications regarding classification;
NOW, THEREFORE, BE IT RESOLVED THAT:
The Office of the President of the United States, and indeed the whole of the free world, endorses Johnny Manziel for the 2012 Heisman Trophy. Gig'em Aggies.