Though the NRA defends the 2nd Amendment right of all Americans to keep and bear firearms, they fail to support the more ancient right of citizens to protect loved ones with ready arm and naked blade.
Therefore, we petition the Obama Administration and Congress to pass a federal law allowing all peace-loving adults to carry razor-edge bladed weapons in all public places, to include but not limited to the broadsword, cutlass, katana, claymore, foil, epee, rapier, saber, scimitar, bayonet, machete, kris, switchblade, throwing knife, dagger, sickle, skewer and rib-tickler.
Further, we implore the White House to institute classes not only in swordplay and short-blade infighting, but in witty repartee and swinging from chandeliers while battling miscreants who threaten the public safety.