Establish Festivus as an official national holiday.

We petition the administration to create an official holiday recognizing Dec. 23 as Festivus for the following reasons:
*Americans need to relieve stress by airing their grievanances
*Feats of strength are consistent with the First Lady's emphasis on fitness and wellness
*Our conservative breatheren think government is most effective when its not working; hence, the need for another day off
*We find tinsel distracting.