As the worlds foremost superpower and its shining beacon of freedom, as Americans we are constantly under threat from attack from those who abide by fascist-esque freedom hating ideologies. It is well known that a best offense is a good defense, thats why as citizens, we should all receive a government issued wallet chain. No-one wants to mess with someone with a wallet chain - it has timelessly stood as a symbol of toughness. If Al-Queda and those sorts come here and try and terrorize and see a bunch of people with wallet chains, they will be like "No Way".



