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Make Jack Bauer the new head of the CIA, Chuck Norris the Czar of Ass Kicking, and Stephen Colbert the Secretary of Bump

Created by E.Z. on November 14, 2012

With Petraeus stepping down, the CIA will need a new leader. I propose bringing Jack Bauer out of retirement. He has already saved America multiple times and proved his ability to get the job done!

Also, with our mounting debt and the impending approach of the fiscal cliff there is a good chance our national defense budget will be slashed. In order to keep our standing as a military powerhouse we will need a new deterrent. With Chuck Norris as the Czar of Asskicking, terrorists will think twice about attacking Americans, as they will receive a roundhouse kick to the face!

Thirdly, we appoint Stephen Colbert the Secretary of Bump. This honorary position will give America the Colbert "Bump", sustaining our world standing as greatest most bestest country in the world ever!

Homeland Security & Defense
Innovation: Arts & Technology
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