In these trying and sorely divided times, it has come to my attention that this nation is wounded, and such a wound has ever deepened to threaten to tear this nation asunder under the dark clouds of hate, ignorance, and the vilification of our neighbors. These wounds have been festering for many a year, resulting from our oldest misconceptions. So it becomes fitting that the solution is an old one, to make me, Joseph E. Blauberg I Emperor of These United States. As Emperor I would allow the existing branches of government to continue undisturbed, but would serve as the moral compass of America, a gentle, understanding, and diplomatic monarch. What I ask for is the title, a palace in which to engage in diplomacy and statesmanship, and an annual salary for myself and my heirs and descendants
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