Middle Parts Shall Save The Earth

In reality middleparted hairstyle pertains to all issues facing these United States in the past, present, and future. Many influential people have adopted the middlepart including the most important; Nicholas Cage. According to studies if this hairstyle is mandated in the nation crime rates, poverty, and obesity will drop dramatically almost immediately after adoptation. Additionally, hairstyle within the first year of being mandated will trigger world peace and bright an end to all conflicts across the world. A modern Renaissance will commence and space travel to the closest stars will become a reality within two decades. In closing the adoptation of the middlepart hairstyle will make these United States the greatest nation in history and will usher in a new golden age for the world.