WHEREAS the use of a Native American mascot is offensive to actual Native Americans,
and WHEREAS some notable Florida State University athletes have had problems obeying the law,
and WHEREAS white collar crime is more of a threat to this country's well-being than other minor crimes which receive more attention,
and WHEREAS weekly reminders of this threat would raise awareness, and thus the stigma of such crimes,
and WHEREAS Florida State University's shorthand for their athletic teams are "The 'Noles," and thus a rebrand not incorporating this nickname is unlikely to stick,
WE THE PEOPLE REQUEST that the White House demand that Florida State University's athletics programs rebrand themselves as the "White Collar Criminoles."