Dear Mr. President Obama: Gage is good. Gage is under house arrest. Gage should be pardoned. If they become POTUS, the Orange Clown won't do it. Hilla the Hun won't do it. Pretty please free Gage, Mr. President. He's voted for you since before he was born. Speaking of born, did you hear there's a new Bourne movie coming this summer. The People will be very happy if Gage is freed and they get to see a new Bourne movie. Oops, gotta go - I have gas. Thank you for listening.
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