This afternoon, in an act of extreme meanness, it seems that President Barack Obama either inadvertently or purposefully broke the handle on my car door. I don't know why. Why, President Obama; why? Anyway, I'm sure it was an accident. In any case, I am seeking remuneration for the damage, for which I have not yet received an estimate from Reed Nissan here in Orlando, Florida. Once I receive it, I will be sure to add the dollar amount to this petition. Thank you for your attention, Mr. President, and no hard feelings.
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