As the founding fathers of the United States of America declared in the Declaration of Independence in 1776:
"When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation."
We, The People of New Orleans, have been forced to endure this indignity far too long. Our backwoods neighbors loosen gun laws, and we face the consequences. They flee urban areas, and clog up our highways to suck jobs away. Let the fools secede from the U.S., but please save us!