Dear Texas et al,
As much as I'd like to get rid of you, we're all in this together. This is the UNITED States of America. So please... shut the hell up about wanting to secede from the union! We understand that your guy lost. Our guy lost in 2000 in a dubious fashion. Did we sign secession petitions? No. This President has his faults, but his ideas are not radically different than the ideas of Presidents you've supported before. You didn't sign secession petitions when Nixon thought up Obamacare. You didn't sign secession petitions when George H. W. Bush raised taxes on the wealthiest Americans to bring down the deficit. You didn't sign secession petitions when George W. Bush bailed out AIG and the banks in 2008. So please... shut the hell up!
Sincerely,
Concerned Citizens