We the undersigned request that President Obama issue an executive order forbidding Stephen Colbert from ever leaving his duties as host of The Colbert Report. This order will save, protect and preserve a righteous American institution, in the name of freedom, democracy and truthiness. Stephen has been a champion and voice to all good, freedom loving Americans; namely himself. By putting Colbert on the CBS Network, that voice will effectively be silenced. Those of us that dreamed of watching The Report into our old age will now have to watch Colbert put people to bed in their old age. We simply request that the president issue an executive order rendering void Stephen’s new contract with CBS, ensuring that he will never, ever leave his position as host of The Colbert Report. #SaveColbert
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