Dear President Obama,
Listen, we got, what, just over a month before this whole 'America' with this 'free press' thing goes into the shit, and we all know you're sick of our bullshit too after 8 years of assholes, but we ask for one last, simple wish, before the lights go out on a world where the most powerful person on the planet isn't 'that guy from The Apprentice':
Tell Scott Wampler to stop being a wuss and finish Yoga Hosers. We want to enjoy his misery and the inevitable amazing review that will come out of it.
Sincerely,
The undersigned.