We've all seen a lot of movies and we know one thing for sure: a "good guy with a gun" doesn't always stop "a bad guy with a gun." But what does?
A Ninja! (every time!)
We call upon our Government to swiftly and without delay enact sweeping legislation requiring that Ninjas be placed in every public K-through-12 school across America during their hours operation or whenever children are present in the building.
This is the only way for we, as a nation, can truly protect our most vital of natural resources; our children.
NINJAS!