You may be wondering why this issue demands President Obama's attention over other pressing concerns. But when it comes down to it, making Amy Schumer the next bachelorette (via executive order or a well-placed call to Chris Harrison) is a win-win-win for America.
First, Amy Schumer as the bachelorette would bring women’s issues to the fore. Schumer would also provide a boost to The Bachelorette’s ratings, and probably the entire American economy. Finally, she’d enhance our relationship with nations abroad by showing just how hilarious, incisive, and sometimes raunchy we Americans can be. This is one of those rare policies that everyone, no matter their political affiliation, can agree on.
President Obama: now is the time to take action. Bachelor fans can’t wait, and neither can America.