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release the plastic-eating sharks

Created by P.P. on May 13, 2015

Calling all scientists! We know you didn't like it when the NSA stole your sharks! With your help, we can help free those sharks to help me help you. You know, it's like a win-win situation. We can release the plastic-eating sharks with the new addition to my arsenal A1692. Now you may be asking yourself, what is the A65391. Well I can't tell you that. 'Cause that is a whole 'nother petition. As you may know, plastic-eating sharks can ingest three tons of plastic per hour. So, we need to release them and set them loose on that Texas coastal trash thing. Now don't worry about that twenty-foot shark trying to eat you because you are not made of plastic. This could solve world plasticness within the course of three years. So apply today.

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