We, the people of the United States, do humbly petition on this, the twenty sixth day of November, in the Year of Our Lord 2012, that all slaves within the United States no longer be counted as three-fifths of a citizen for the purposes of Congressional representation.
For too long, these brave, hard-working people have suffered at the hands of their masters; men who have used the presence of slaves within their states to bolster their legislative power. Until the slaves can be peacefully emancipated, the government must act to ensure that slaveholders are not granted preferential representation because of their subjugation of others. We, the undersigned, ask that slaves no longer count as three-fifths of a citizen, and yearn for the day that they may count as five-fifths of one.