replace all forks with sporks and to make regular forks illegal. Punishable by some jail time.

Forks are impractical and outdated in this day and age. Sporks are much more effective and should be required by law. I used a fork recently to eat a bowl of rice and it was very difficult to eat the last few grains. I replaced all my forks with sporks so this wouldn't be so difficult next time and I couldn't be happier. This is our chance to set an example to other nations that we can accept change. Replace all forks with sporks.