Dear Beloved Citizens of America,
A tragedy has recently befallen us. As children, we can all remember the immense delight, the genuine spark in our young eyes, as we beheld the most delicious of seasonal delicacies.
Samoas. Tagalongs. Do-Si-Do's. Trefoils. And who could forget the ever-popular king of the cookie hill, master of the cookie profits: the Thin Mint.
That is a time now lost. Samoas are now Caramel Delites, forgoing creativity for a simplistic generality. Do-Si-Do's (you could almost dance to that title) has become the boring, uninspired Peanut Butter Patties. And Trefoils has become Shortbreads. Gee, I wonder what cookie that is.
Band with me, America, and together, as one voice, we can bring originality and imagination back to the Girl Scout Cookies!