We, Her Majesty's Government, petition that the colonies of the United States of America return all governing rights to Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II. All resources owed to the Crown since 1776 will be collected and regiments of Redcoats will be sent to ensure a smooth transition.
Independance is clearly not working for you and you are not ready to govern yourselves as you slaughter yourselves in droves on a daily basis and have betrayed the principles your country was founded upon, such as "All men are equal." You seem to think that this only applies to Caucasians and that the rich are more equal than the rest of society.
Clearly your excessive use of therapists, lawyers and guns to resolve issues shows that you aren't ready for independence either.