To Support And Help Pass Through Congress; "The Public Restroom Masturbation Act"

“Twas the night before Thanksgiving.
All the food's in the oven. And I'm in the bedroom performin' self lovin'.”
- Craig Ferguson
We would like your support in passing "The Public Bathroom Masturbation Act" through Congress. We believe that every man and or woman over the age of 18 should have the right to walk into any public bathroom in this great country and have a "good time". Current federal law prohibits masturbation in a public bathroom and we would like to change this. Studies have shown masturbation to be healthy and to improve ones mood.
Its many health benefits are still being discovered. Such as lowering prostate cancer by 33%. Other countries are starting to support this as well.
http://www.ottawasun.com/2013/09/18/masturbating-in-public-ok-swedish-co...
God Bless