Given that un-American liberals are having a hissy-fit over the cessation petition and are petitioning the government to strip any American who signs such a petition of their citizenship and deport them, we petition the President to:
1 - require that anyone creating and/or signing the above petition be required to attend remedial reading classes at the elementary school nearest their home address; and
2 - require said persons to read the Constitution of the United States; and
3 - tell those un-American liberals to go soak their heads.