The USA can ill afford to be burdened and hobbled by the backward and paranoid beliefs and practices of the people of Texas. We shall protect the integrity of our culture and economy by closing the border and restricting employment in the US for citizens of Texas to those with advanced degrees and an avowed acknowledgement of facts, such as gravity, the age of the Earth and broccoli. Federal assets will be returned or purchased by Texas at fair market value. Professional sports teams will be removed from participation in US sports leagues. Inmates of Federal prisons in Texas will be pardoned and released as citizens of Texas. Puerto Rico will be granted statehood. Individuals and entities in Texas will be barred from contributing to politically active groups in the US such as the NRA.
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